I wish i could just burst/explode/cry/vanish/melt/implode/disappear/shrink or pop right now. I tell u ah i just totally cannot stand it lor. It's like our male emsemble is just totally screwed and like bursted liao. Earlier is like we perform to toh then his 'verdict' was just so stupid and demoralizing and aiya whatever la our male emsemble might as well just surrender and not perform lor.
And then he was like saying what people are going to compare us with Sl emsemble it's like u think we don't know meh. It's like so obvious we're like 10 thousand times lousier. I tell you it's totally not the standard of singing, the people we have in male emsemble are good singers they're just very not mature enough lor. But still, they're SLs emsemble compared to us is also not fair. I mean like almost everyone except for like 5 people are sec 2s and like everyone except 1 in SL group is sec 3/4. It's so unfair/inbalance and he expects us to be as good as them? They have like how many mor eyears of experience, they're SLs like HELLO they have the discipline and everything and they know the urgency and everything.
It's like now i suddenly know how ivan feels. I mean like even just now we were trying choreo, people like guan wei and just basically nobody was really listening and concentrating. Like we only had 20 minutes to do it then they wanted to sprout ideas like really lor do we have so much time?? Then that lihe is like sec 3 then he was the worst of them all la. Kept doing dunno what actions and blah di blah. Then wah really so frustrating my voice drop by like 3 tones just after shouting at them and my throat hurts now.
Then it's like toh also isn't really fair to us, i mean we're obviously not as good as SLs then he still doesn't want to work with us or what. He worked more times with SLs than us lor. Then like just now, he was like saying we should try this try that then work things out ourselves like our arrangement blah di blah then like SL group he like ownself shift them around, then he summore say "ok let me help u with this problem" like wtf la it's as if he has totally given up on us like that. Which i wish he did actually then we wouldn't have to embarass ourselves on stage, wouldn't have had to spend so much freaking time practising, staying back whatevers and like just get the entire choir to sing seasons of love if he thinks it's that nice. But yet he says we're not good enough so like what's his freaking problem. He ownself say what we only have 3 days left u think we ourselves can improve? It's like SL emsemble has the 2 SCs to hear our for sharps and flats whatever we don't even have anybody here to help us.
Then like everyone just says seasons of love is nice like what rubbish is that lor we're like going out of tune with no dynamics or whatever shit then our ezekiel everyone's like.. ok. so like freaking waste of time we might as well not even sing it right. I mean embarass ourselves later go back to school then like everyone ask us why we so lousy then like what to say? We have lousy pok members? Toh doesn't give a damn about us?
I tell u we'll be like the first and last ever male chamber emsemble in RI man it's just such a disaster. And besides male chamber is just horrendous coz like we only have 2 octaves of range then lik 4 sections in 2 octaves?!?! Then like clash here clash there it's just horrible. Urgh. Wah whoever watching our concert better not laugh at us or whateve rjust sit there and bear it ok. Sigh.
It's like just amazing, how our sec 4 batch right, i cannot imagine us doing whatever the current sec 2 batch is doing. Just like the sec 1s now, they're like so mild and quiet while the yishu/guanwei whatever people ar ejust so rowdy and cannot focus. Like we were just trying to LINE UP and they couldn't evne stand in a straight line?!!?! Like we stand liao then they'll start moving out, moving in then like wtf i'm like losing my voice liao lor. Then even like louis or benjamin also don't really help to try to pass the message or whatever. Wah just damn irritated la. Maybe like dennis or whoever said we shouldn't have choreo is right, just sing and get it over and done with and maybe we will be spared even more embarassement if we like slide and fall off the stage or something.
Haiz.
3 more days to concert. How sad is like work so hard for it then just one night and then like dunno do what for rest of year. Must concentrate on studies and then back to boring mon/wed choir practices. Wonder what new songs we'll learn, back to irritating/boring sectionals.. Aiya whatever la.
I am irritated. We can't even stay in tune. Bye.
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